


Moving Forward

by Azhure99



Category: Mo Dau Zu Shi, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:34:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29495886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azhure99/pseuds/Azhure99
Summary: Wei Wuxian returns home to Cloud Recesses after meeting the son of man he killed at Nightless city. He and his husband deal with the emotional aftermath of the past.
Relationships: WangXian - Relationship
Kudos: 3





	Moving Forward

Wei Wuxian was in a daze, his mind completely numb to the world around him as his well practiced feet carried him back to Cloud Recess and all the way back to the room he shared with Lan Wangji.

Lan Wangji looked up from his work on the desk as the door opened, excitement filling his heart as the only one who would open that door without announcing themselves was his husband who he hadn’t seen in far too many weeks. But when his eyes fell on his husband, his heart stopped in his chest.

“Wei Ying!” He called out in fear rushing to his feet and over to his Wei Ying. “Wei Ying, what happened to you?”

Wei Wuxian stood still, visibly swaying on his feet. His robes were tattered, dirty, there were blood stains in places. His? His face was neutral like he wasn’t all there, his eyes haunted by something Lan Wangji couldn’t see. 

“Wei Ying!” he called again reaching him, cupping his face in his hands and pulling him closer. “Wei Ying” Softer this time, the voice only a concerned lover could make.

Wei Wuxian slowly raised his haunted sleepless eyes to meet Lan Wangji’s bright caring ones. “I-” He started but gulped trying to fix his dry mouth. “I don’t deserve this.”

Lan Wangji was visibly panicked at this point, his eyes darting over every inch of his husband's face. “Wei Ying,” He tried to reassure and redirect, “What happened?”

“Yiling Laozu” He whispered, tears breaking free from his eyes as he closed them in shame.

“He died.” Lan Wangji said softly but firmly. “He’s dead.” He said, pulling his Wei Ying against his chest in a tight hug meant to ground him back to reality.

“The families of the people he murdered aren't” he said hauntingly, breathy in between tears.

Lan Wangji’s breath hitched in his throat, he closed his eyes in horror at the realization, his arms tightening around his love. He laid a gentle kiss on his forehead. “Wei Ying is not the Yiling Laozu.” He declared with finality.

A small smile involuntarily formed itself on Wei Wuxian’s lips. How could Lan Wangji be so perfect? How could such a man have fallen for him? How could he have forgiven what he’s done? He grabbed his Lan Zhan’s arms and slowly pulled them off of him and took a step back creating a gap between them. “You knew.” He paused, “and you knew I didn’t remember.” He lifted his eyes to lock with his husbands for a brief moment before dropping his gaze to the floor again. “You didn’t tell me.”

_ How could I? _ Wangji thought to himself. He had witnessed a fully possessed Wei Wuxian end thousands of lives at Nightless City, some innocent and he had still risked everything to save him. He never stopped loving him despite it all, and couldn’t bear to see Wei Wuxian face the consequences of his actions. He wasn’t even there at the siege of the burial mounds he had been here half conscious, half alive from the whipping. Hadn’t been there to protect Wei Ying. Keep him alive. Keep him from killing anyone else… “I’m sorry” He choked out fighting tears.

This was enough to snap Wei Wuxian out of his own thoughts and reach out and grab and hold Lan Wangji’s hand in his. He tilted his chin to look up at the love of his life while giving his hand a little squeeze. “I thought we agreed no sorry’s between us?” He forced a slight smile to cheer his husband. He frowned as he realized it wasn’t working. “Hmm? Lan Zhan!” He raised his voice to snap his husband from his memories.

Only then did Lan Wangji blink slowly and finally look at his Wei Ying. “Mn.” He rumbled and Wei Ying broke into a smile, popping onto his toes and laying a gentle kiss on Wangji’s lips. “I didn’t tell Wei Ying.” He said, pulling away a little unwillingly. “I didn’t want him to be hurt anymore.”

Wei Wuxian turned his head away to stare at the wall for a minute to regain his composure as the look on Lan Zhan’s face was so overpoweringly full of love he couldn’t stand it. He used his sleeve to wipe the tears forming in his own eyes before turning back to look at his husband. “You knew?”

“Mn.” Wangji confirmed.

“You saved me anyway?”

“Mn”

“Lan Zhan…” It was more a whine than anything. “And you decided not to tell me so I wouldn’t be upset?”

This time Wangji only nodded.

“You idiot” Wei Wuxian laughed softly to himself. “You love me that much?”

Wangji stared at him for what felt like forever before he finally said. “What do you think?”

Wei Wuxian looked up at the ceiling, then to his right, then to the ground. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes before turning his back on Lan Wangji. He signed and finally managed a quiet “I don’t deserve it”

\---

Wangji had had just about as much as he could take of Wei Ying's haunted feeling. It made Wei Ying feel further away from him, like when he had lost him. His heart hurt thinking of it. His… He shook his head to clear the dark spots from taking over his vision. Everything felt a little fuzzy. 

"LAN ZHAN!" 

Wei Ying's voice cut through the blur. Next he knew, he was on the floor in Wei Ying's arms staring up into his eyes. Wangji reached up and stroked his cheek gently, nervously. 

In that moment Wei Wuxian remembered, even if he didn't deserve his happy ending, Lan Zhan really did. "I'm here Lan Zhan. You just fainted. It's ok now, I'm here." He cooed using his hand to hold the other's against his cheek. 

He leaned down and kissed his husband soft on the lips, firmly intending to show him  _ exactly _ what he means to him. As he pulled away slowly, he pulled some spiritual power up from his core, to lift Lan Zhan into his arms and princess carry him to the bed. “Gege will have to wait a minute, I’m very dirty” He teased.

Wangji tried to sit up but Wei ying placed a hand on the center of his chest and held him down. The pout on his lips convinced Wangji to stay down.

Wei Wuxian broke into a smile as Lan Zhan relaxed under his hand. “Everytime you answer ‘yes’ by nodding I’ll take off a piece of clothing. Ok?”

Lan Wangji nodded. 

“Good” Wei Wuxian started by removing his red ribbon and let his dirty hair flow freely down his back. “Did gege miss me while I was away?”

Lan Wangji nodded and Wei Wuxian removed his belt.

Wei Wuxian scratched his nose as he thought of his next question. “Has it been so long that if I tease you too much you’ll force yourself on me before I can bathe?”

Another nod and he removed his boots while laughing to himself.

“Lan Zhan I am covered in dirt and blood from the hunt, how can you still want me?” Silence. He shook his head. “Not a yes or no question… fine. If I’m a good boy will gege bathe me first?”

Another nod pulled a mischievous smile from Wei wuxian as he slipped off his pants, leaving only his inner robes on.

But this time Wei Wuxian was deadly serious. “Did you faint out of worry for me?”

Wangji took longer to respond this time, first turning his face away and then nodding. He heard the sounds of Wei Wuxian getting into his tub. He had had a bath prepared incase of Wei Ying’s arrival every night for a week anxiously waiting for his return from night hunting with the juniors. The last six nights he had merely stared at the empty bath wishing his naked husband was in it. Finally this night he was. Wangji turned his head to look as Wei Wuxian got comfortable in the warm water and Wangji was as compulsively drawn to him as he had everyday since they met. His feet moved on their own until he was on his knees beside the tub.

Wei Ying kissed him slowly and whispered. “You know I don’t deserve you, right?”

“Wei Ying.” His voice was calm but firm as if admonishing a child. His eyes dropped for a second then returned to stare back into his love’s, “No, It’s I who don’t deserve you.”

“Lan Zhan! Are you insane? How could you possibly say that?!” he jumped and splashed the front of Lan Zhan’s robes where his arms reached out to grab onto them. “Huh? How could you think that?!” 

Wangji to a deep calming breath before placing his hands on both of Wei Ying’s wrists. “Wei Ying,” He started slowly, picking his words carefully so as to express the truth but not further hurt the man he loved. “At nightless city. I knew you had lost control, I saw what happened, I knew…” He looked ashamed as he looked down at his hands on Wei Ying’s wrists. “I knew what Wei Ying would think if he knew. But I…” He swallowed gently to try to keep himself from crying as he turned over Wei Yings’ wrist in his hand and leaned down to kiss his pulse. “I couldn’t…” He shook his head.

Wei Wuxian finally understood. Drunk Lan Zhan had said he regretted not being on his side at Nightless, and sober Lan Zhan regretted his inability to protect people from him at Nightless. He must have been so confused, so torn, and so alone. Wei Wuxian moved to grip bothe his lovers hands desperately in his own “Lan Zhan, In the last life, for causing you pain like that, I didn’t deserve to even die by your hand. But Lan Zhan in this life I swear I’ll never hurt you again.” His voice was increasing in strength as he went trying desperately to convince them both. “And I know that means not getting hurt myself either.” He reached his hand up to wipe Lan Zhan’s tears. “I didn’t mean to scare you earlier, In this life I’ll find a way to atone without hurting anyone, especially you... I love you…”

It wasn’t long before Wangji found himself naked in the tub on top of Wei Ying.

  
  
  
  



End file.
